Monday, November 15, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge!

Day 3-Your first love
My first love was right after high school.  I found out one of my best friend’s brother had a crush on me.  He was five years older than me and I thought, “Wow, he has a crush on me.”  We began flirting some and the summer after I graduated from high school I started working at a local factory, where he worked, to earn extra money for college.  Sometimes he would drive me to/ home from work.  We began hanging out and watching movies together.  I loved the attention he gave me.  I was scared that once I started college it would end.  However, we continued dating through college.  He often came to visit me. Or I would go home on the weekends to visit him.  We dated for about 3 years.  We got along great; I only wished we could see each other more often.  During my junior year of college I began to pressuring him about what was going to happen after college.  Since I’m not close with my parents I planned on moving and teaching in a NEW state.  However, if he wanted something more serious between us I told him I would move back to my home town.  We argued about it because he would always say, “I don’t want to hold you back.  Move it’s what is best for you.”  (To me that meant, I don’t want to be with you.)  We pretty much broke up at that point but we remained friends and often talked on the phone.  Several weeks later. . . he called and he had changed his mind.  He wanted to be with me.  He wanted something more.  We got back together.  However it wasn’t what it was before. I wasn’t sure what it was but I knew IT (this) wasn’t what I really wanted.  We continued to date for a few months.  Then he called one day and said, “I changed my mind.  You should move.”  I was like. . . WHAT?!?  I couldn’t believe him.  I was devastated.  I loved him and wanted to be with and but at the same time didn’t want to be.  I knew what we once had was gone.  I was afraid of moving on and afraid of losing my BEST FRIEND.  I soon found out that during out break-up he had gotten another girl pregnant.  Finally it became clear.  After college I moved 10 hours from home and it was the best thing that I could have done for me!!  It was so hard especially since he was my best friend.  But the move helped me find out how strong I was and learn about what I like and want out of life. 

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